Friday , 27 May 2022

Nancy Clench: Group Sex to heal the Referendum rifts

Nancy Clench hopes for a YES vote
Nancy Clench hopes for a YES vote

Scotland’s biggest drag queen, Nancy Clench, says the only real method of healing the rifts in Scotland after the Referendum, whichever the result, is some group sex!

In an exclusive interview with KaleidoScot, Glasgow-based Nancy told us there could be lots of benefits too. “Well if it’s a Yes vote, I’m hopeful places like the Highlands will get a proper 3G signal because they’re really missing out on Grindr. That should be one of the priorities of the first Scottish Government. Those poor people I feel for them, I really do.”

Asked how things might change for drag queens if the Union stays together, she told us, “We’ll get unionised and have membership cards and everything! Joking aside, I don’t think Drag Queens stand to benefit exclusively. The LGBTI Community stand to benefit a heck of a lot though – it’s a massive statement for all the political parties, apart from the Conservatives, to say they’ll enshrine our rights in a written constitution – that’s a Scotland we can all be proud of.”

Thousands of Nancy’s supporters have been taking part in the debate and sending her messages on the most important decision in Scotland’s history. She’s been talking to lots of campaigners and said, “The Yes team have the biggest smiles on their faces because it’s a positive message – and it’s clearly been working! So far, seeing so many people getting engaged with the process has been amazing. I mean, it’s not the usual topic of conversation after a winch on the Polo dance floor, but people know this is an important decision. I always ask because I’ll never kiss a no voter, until the 19th at least.”

Nancy Clench "Queen of Scotland"?
Nancy Clench “Queen of Scotland”?

Asked who she would like to debate with, Nancy beams, “I think a good style Drag-off between Vanity von Glow and I would go down well. Not that her opinion matters, she’s too busy trying to find the right key to sing in.”

Nancy says style is important in the first days after the vote too, with a message for the main women leading the campaign, “Get some colour. Let’s walk in to Independence with a nice splash of colour from our women”, she encourages.

Our female monarch would be in for a surprise if Nancy was elected to office, though, as she explains her priorities for an Independent Scotland, “Champagne for everyone! I think flying the rainbow flag permanently above my residence would be something I’d do right away and would be a first for any world leader – although I’d prefer the term Queen. Yes, Queen of Scotland.”

Nancy will be watching events unfold live from her extensive dressing suite in the posh Southside of Glasgow. She encourages everyone to use their vote on this momentous occasion, “Gawn oot and vote – hold your head up high and  now that you’ve helped make Scotland better – no matter how you’ve voted. Democracy in action… then go for a Vodka. Vodka helps everything. I think we’re all mature enough to go for a drink together on Friday 19th no matter the result – just who is buying is at question!”

Nancy has been encouraging people to get involved and have their say in the KaleidoScot Referendum Poll. We’re asking LGBTI people across the nation to let us know how they plan to vote and what the important issues are for them. The Poll closes at 5pm on Thursday 11th September.

You can take part by clicking HERE

Nancy wants Grindr for all.
Nancy wants Grindr for all.

About Stuart Duffy

Stuart Duffy
Stuart is a Glasgow-based journalist covering LGBTI issues and has been published in ScotsGay Magazine, Gay Star News, Pink News as well as numerous local publications over the past 18 years. Brought up in his hometown of Cowdenbeath in Fife, he has studied Radio Broadcasting and Event Management and has worked with leading businesses such as BSkyB and most recently Glasgow 2014 Commonwealth Games. He has a keen interest in politics, current affairs and entertainment and when he's not writing Stuart is usually found in the City shops with his partner and young daughter.

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